What do your habits say about you?

Our daily habits reflect on to the world. It may seem as though we can hide these habits, but we do most of them subconsciously, so what we do in the dark comes to the light. These habits I speak of cross many lines. Eating habits. Music selection habits. Screen viewing habits. Communication habits. Internal self-talk habits. Habits of focusing on the most catastrophic events. Hygiene habits.

Practice the habit of positivity. There is power in this habit. I cannot overstate this concept. This is not a total disregard for doubt, negativity and evil. However, it is a concept that many people overlook. When a new challenge presents itself, if the habit is to say, “I can’t do that.” This will always be your reality. A new habit or approach to take would be to say, “I’ve never done before. I wonder if I can?” This new mental framing will take some getting used to. Of course, if you are an amputee or have previous injuries, take whatever precautions you need to. Some activities are dangerous even with proper instruction. Getting over the fear of the unknown takes practice. Staying in the comfort zone with minimal challenges feels good until it’s time to do actually do something really hard.

It is at that critical moment staying in our comfort zone does us no favors. At the extreme opposite end, being out of the comfort zone too much can be extremely overwhelming, so a healthy balance is necessary. Get into the habit of making sentences that offer solutions instead of excuses. Get into the habit of making sentences that uplift people. Get into the habit of uplifting yourself.

-Baker out

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3 Keys to Happiness & Success

The three ideas I have to be happy & successful in life, can easily be substituted by the proper synonym. However, I feel as though these three ideas fit right in to everyday life.

1. Sacrifice; This is a noticeable word, but often has negative connotations (as it should). When you sacrifice SOMETHING of VALUE, you wish you could have it back. If it is community service, organizing your family reunion, or trying to grow your business, sacrificing your time will take its toll on the structure of your life. While you're giving energy to the new challenge, 100% effort must be put in to ensure proper functioning of the event. This will be another chance for us to sacrifice time/effort in our attention to detail, being sure not to miss any opportunities for improvements. If we are trying to improve our position in life we will need to sacrifice time developing skills to advance in to more prestigious responsibilities. All the volunteering in the world will more than likely not pay the bills. You will need to figure out skills to trade for money to trade for other goods & services. If you are lucky enough to be working or running a business that provides all that your family needs, you have won at life. If you hide in the bathroom at work or despise going to the place where you make money, CHANGE IT! You have control over this. Perhaps you're not ready to truly SACRIFICE something of value to better your situation.

2. Sweat; This is where all the work must be done. If you are able to do what you are passionate about and make money, there will still be days where you DO NOT want to sacrifice the necessary time. If you feel yourself at this point, please read #1. When you're ready to WORK for your goals, the sweat will be so much more fulfilling. I am a trainer. I train groups of people. I train partners. I train individuals. In order to maintain a level of competency, I must increase my knowledge, I must take thorough notes (for modified activities), and I must lead by example. Reading alone isn't enough. I have to be able to share the information I have retained. I have to transfer the information in a non-technical fashion, so my clients can retain & share it. I do workout ALMOST EVERYDAY, but not working out like you may think. I incorporate flexibility & recovery days, as a way to decrease injury potential. With the mix of weights, flexibility, and Jiu-Jitsu my 5-6 days are covered. My body & mind are a part of a billboard of my services, so it must be well kept. On a daily basis, get a mental sweat and/or physical sweat!   

3. Smile; When the day is easy or filled with enjoyable activities smiling isn't a problem. It is when the day is filled with frustration, discomfort, and misery that it will be much more difficult to crack a true smile. However, If you can see the how much worse the situation could be, this should be just enough positive stimulation to raise a GENUINE ear to ear grin. Find small things to appreciate during the unfavorable time. Perhaps you are in the shitty situation with a friend, in that case think about future plans or times when things were much worse. This should lighten the mood and give your mind something to focus the energy on. Stay positive and remove negative thoughts. This negative energy is quite powerful and dangerous. Negative energy creates momentum quickly. It must be destroyed by visualizing a favorable outcome. The power of visualization is underrated. Your mind must be able to create the idea that task completion is even possible for us to have a fighting chance. These thoughts alone will not generate the victory. Please see #2 for ways to achieve victory. When you are faced with adversity, smile while you think of ways to conquer. 

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How to get more out of the day!

This post will focus on a simple way to accomplish more in our 24 hours.

Getting the most out of the day means we need to be proactive. If you are looking to get more out of the day, there may be a few different reasons as to why our ambitions have increased. This increase in ambition will also increase our stress level. The stress level is increased due to the decreased time to accomplish goals. In an effort to reduce this stress, start by setting limits on leisure activities. Social media, video games, and Internet browsing can be a great way to relax, but they can also be a major criminal, the way they steal our time.

Setting these limits, on leisure activities, can be as easy as setting a reminder on your phone. Having an outside regulator, pushing you to the next task, may be just the thing to help generate the needed momentum for behavior modification. We set goals for many different reasons. The ability to accomplish these goals really depends (usually) on the determination and discipline we are willing to put forth. Not understanding how to get started can feel quite overwhelming. The alarm to move on to the next task will set the ground work to be more self-reliant, self-aware, and focused.

Time management can be worked on at any moment in the day. The idea about setting an alarm to move on to new tasks is only the beginning. If you are finding yourself losing time on socializing and wondering through the internet, over the course of a few days, try to notice how long you are scrolling and cut the time by 25%. This reduction of self-indulgence will be difficult to combat, even if you are actively trying to change the behavior. The needed support system will come in the form of an alarm pushing you to your goal. With this information in mind, work every moment of every day to achieve the things that are important to you.  

5 Stages of change

In life there is adversity. We are challenged by different obstacles on a daily basis. In order to mature we must change. In life (and fitness) there are stages of readiness. I am certified by NASM as a personal trainer. Today we will talk about NASM's 5 Stages of Change. If I want change I must set an attainable goal, with a deadline, then focus all efforts towards that goal. If you are not ready to change you will never reach that goal. There will be no magic pill purchased on the internet or the dark web, that will allow you to achieve your goals. You must be ready to modify your behavior to achieve.

1. Precontemplation: As a trainer, I would need to educate & dispel any myths that folks at this stage may have. People at this stage have no intention of working out and do not plan to start in the next 6 months. Because I cannot force intention on anyone, education is key for people who are in this stage.

2. Contemplation: These people are not very active either, but they are thinking of becoming more active in the next six months. Because contemplators are thinking about starting training, education is still the best strategy. Trainers could help influence the decision by listening to what the person wants, and what they actually need. Contemplators need the proper support system to help motivate them in the proper direction. 

3. Preparation: Ok here we are! People in this stage do workout (occasionally), but are looking to make it a regular thing in the next month. They believe in the health benefits of fitness and nutrition. People in this stage may have a few misconceptions or unrealistic ideas about achieving their goals. This misunderstanding increases the chances of disappointment an early dropout.

4. Action: These people are getting after it, but they aren't able to maintain the behavior for six months. Again, education is great for reenforcing their beliefs in the health benefits of exercise. It is important to discuss the obstacles & disruptions that may lay down the road. Anticipate upcoming events that can derail progress made, Unforeseen adversity is a given and we can be better prepared by practicing for the known adversity. 

5. Maintenance: This is the place to be! People here have been able to maintain change for six months or more. Fitness is apart of their lifestyle. In this stage we can still be tempted return to old habits of less exercise. A certain level of discipline is reached at this stage, but a support system is just as important as it is for the people in the previous stages.   

4 Things Successful People do!

1. Set a goal; this will help focus your efforts on something you truly desire. Putting an end date or deadline on the goal will also help create a sense of urgency. 

2. Believe in yourself; Along the way to the finish line you will encounter rejection & failure. Trust in the process. Believe in the possibility of achieving, even when others may express doubt.

3. Be flexible; When we encounter that rejection, this is the moment to adjust the execution of the plan. It's not that our goal is unattainable, maybe we have just met more adversity that we had expected. Reevaluate your plan, then start fresh at the beginning of a new day. If the goal is to lose 100lbs in a year, don't give up at 50lbs (6-7 months in) with the justification of the last half being too far away. YOU'RE HALF WAY THERE!! Adjust the nutrition, workouts, or lifestyle. 

4. Be appreciative; in all aspects of life. Be thankful you have a car, for someone to cut you off in. Be thankful you have grocery money, even though the line to buy is 20mins long. Appreciate all your efforts. Do not negate your effort. Appreciate the hard work of others. This will reinforce your support system & spread the love we're all looking for.  

3 ways to create a better you!

1. Face one fear- This will generate the construction of a support system and increase self confidence. Sharing your goals with people allow you express ideas, but also leaves you vulnerable. If we get that idea out in to the world enough, the support will crystalize. This takes a bit of belief, but when the smallest bit of success is reached it will also increase the self confidence.  Learn from your (& other peoples) mistakes & successes. The stories of how people deal with struggle are inspiring. They encourage us to withstand the adversity for one more day. The confidence will come with an increase in repetitions. The more you face that fear, the easier it'll be to deal with.    

2. Try something new- After facing a fear, this should be easy. It can be as simple as trying a new sport or activity. Perhaps calling a relative or an old friend once a week and even reading more books. This will generate humility for lack of skill. If you can stick to it, the benefits are immeasurable. New pathways are created in the brain, due to exposure of unforeseen obstacles. The feeling of accomplishment has the potential to grow, even more so if consistency can be maintained. 

3. Allow 20-25 days for new habit to solidify- For this span of time, your anxiety may increase with anticipation of the end result. This is normal. This is time to appreciate the process. No matter what the goal is, when someone is trying to modify their behavior to reach a goal, there will be push back from unforeseen things in life. This is normal. Appreciate the discipline your putting in your body! Conquering fears and trying new things can be one in the same. If those goals overlap, these 20-25 days are crucial in laying a foundation that leads to success. 

Betrayal

Trust is something very fragile. You can have moments with people, that seem to connect both parties on a deeper level. That moment of shared experiences and other common interest can seem quite obvious. Then, at some unforeseen time, that fragile connection can be forever shattered and never mended.

What turns people on to betray? Perhaps in their social arena they can moved forward to a new level of authority & dominance..? Maybe hurting others is what makes them happy. By ruining the "trust" they have known intelligence that someone else is as miserable as they are. Maybe they feel elevated & superior over the person/ people they hurt..? 

I wonder if they see their prey on the horizon or are these deceivers opportunistic, waiting until they have just enough information to tear the other person down? I would guess a mix of both. I would be lying if I said I never broke the trust bond. I've learned over time, it is wise to be open to the idea of trusting others. It would also be to our benefit if we were careful with bits of information that we share. If you can express ideas and perspectives in an articulate manner, chances are like minded individuals will stand with you, even if the idea is not popular.      

Repossession

We all have a struggle in life. At times there may be multiple struggles running in parallel. Some of these struggles lie beneath the surface and do not arise until they are most inconvenient. These struggles occur when we neglect our daily responsibilities and allow discipline to slip. The adversity will seem trivial at first, but before you know it, control is lost.

A large number of crazies lurking around Campbell is normal. However, a knock at the door at 11pm is not. I open the door asking the stranger what the deal was and the bearded man informed me he was there to repo my Mazda 626. I was two payments behind and the bank was not playing around! I was offered a chance to gather a few items from the vehicle if I chose. I took the tow truck driver up on the offer. As we walked to my car, I asked the gentleman the best & fastest way to get my car back. He informed me I needed to get current with the bank ($750 to be exact). I could only afford partial payment, so I was in a tight spot.

When cars are often repossessed, it is at night. I had work the next day, so getting there would be a challenge. Not only did I need to borrow a car to get to work, but I also needed to borrow money to get my car back from the tow company. It was not looking good for me. Thankfully I had a wonderful support system with friends and family. By the end of the day, the Mazda was back in my possession and I racked up a $400 bill in IOU's. Over time I worked my debt off or paid it back, how ever I could. To think of the time in my life I couldn't afford a $375 car payment, keeps me hungry for new challenges and new opportunities to help others. It was from the help of many others, that I have reached success. It was the support system I found myself in that helped me realize how loved & successful I really am.  

Childhood

I was born in March of 1980, in San Jose, California. I was my mother's only child, with my father many miles away. He may have been in the delivery room that special day, but when it was all over his place was else where. It was hard for me to understand why my dad didn't live with us. My mom made it very clear to me that my dad did love me, but was definitely going to live with his other family. This made me think of the construction of me. Was I an accident? Was I a strategic movement in the game of life, that had backfired resulting in the current situation? So many questions at a young age, but not well articulated.

I visited my second family most holidays and summers. It was my chance to bond with my siblings. I loved my older brother! In fact, I would follow him EVERYWHERE! If he would go in to the kitchen for water, I would be there grabbing a glass too. Going to the bathroom? I would stand out side and wait. I was like his light skinned shadow, with no chance of ditching me. This game of follow the leader wasn't always welcomed by my brother, but I think he knew I just really looked up to him. As his patience would run thin, he would often start showing off his athleticism to see just how far I would mimic. I knew I didn't stand a chance once he started walking on the top beam of a wooden fence or bust out a few back hand springs. This just increased my desire to be like him even more.

My younger sister was also around, but very independent. We would have an occasional wrestling match that she would win. I believe her success came from testing her technique in earlier matches with my brother. She tolerated me as much as she could, but would definitely get irritated with my ignorance to country life, as well as, my lack of pop culture knowledge. The music for the latest dances, movies, or TV shows I had no clue what was cool and what was not. I had no idea what it meant to have siblings. When I was in San Jose, I was an only child. If my mom was at work, I would be at the babysitters or home alone (depending on my age). I didn't have to be witty with come back jokes. I didn't have to be punctual to get in the bathroom first thing in the morning. I liked this style of living; lots of chaos and always someone to talk to or play with.  

When I would spend a few weeks out of the summer in Tulare. I loved the first week or so, after that I would get home sick and want to return to the bay. Days while my brother & sister would be at summer school, I would spend long days with my grandmother. She would be smoking a bunch of cigarettes, screaming at contestants on game shows giving the wrong answers, and drinking cases of beers. I was too young to appreciate the life knowledge she would drop on my head, but the more and more she repeated it, the more it sunk in. 

I am thankful growing up a Baker. Make no mistake my mother's side has made amazing contributions to my life, but today we are focusing one side of me. Growing up as a Baker taught me the importance of planning out your life. I received many stories of wrong choices and living with ones decisions. Thinking I was immune to similar fates, I didn't pay close attention to the struggle of those before me. All the prior knowledge has since been taken in and mulled over. I am thankful I have had to work for all my success. The appreciation for achievement cannot be measured. Remembering nights my dad would get home late from working the train yard, to tuck us in bed, makes me want to work even harder, so I can be home earlier enough to see my kids grow up!